Having reconciled myself to the fact I’m not going back to work for another few weeks, I decided I had better use the time wisely. I had big ideas of walking miles and going back to work looking super svelte and 10 years younger. Actually Storm Brendan put paid to that almost instantly and my motivation went out the window. They’ll have to put up with me chubbier and a bit more care worn.
I also discovered that Mr T and Mr M heighten any intolerance you might have. I don’t mean, say, to Manchester United fans, I mean physically.
I have always had a slight intolerance to lactose but I do treat myself to a real milk hot chocolate every now and then with very little consequences. I figured I deserved a treat this week and dived into a hot choc and cream. Disaster! Barely made it home – I will spare you the details, but it wasn’t pretty and was also incredibly painful. Won’t be trying that out again until after September when Mr T and Mr M should be leaving my life.
The other joyful thing they have brought is hair growth. Yup, sounds good, but then have a think about all the other places hair grows on your body….
Years ago I went with a friend for a Brazilian, not the footballer kind. I’m not going to explain it, so you’ll have to look it up if you don’t know. Maybe don’t google it on your works PC!
Anyway, she really wanted to do it and persuaded me to join her for moral support. We went to a posh salon in Dublin. We were taken off to our separate treatment rooms and didn’t see each other for another hour. As I’ve got older I’ve lost any inhibitions with beauty therapists and nurses – they’ve seen it all and really don’t care what you look like ‘down there’ , but this was a first for me and the whole experience was mortifying and I ended up looking like a plucked chicken. Not as mortifying as my friend though. When she came out she was pale faced, paid her money and we left swiftly. Only when we were safely ensconced in the pub next door did she reveal that her beautician had commented on how hairy her bottom was and made her get up on all fours to wax ‘everywhere’!!!!
I literally couldn’t breath for about half an hour from laughing so much. She was so indignant. She moved back to Australia not long after that and I often wonder if she recounts that tale to anyone – I’m guessing not.
Actually though, I’m talking about hair growth on my legs. I’ve never been a particularly hairy person and could go for at least a week without shaving my legs, now it’s two days! And you might think well what does it matter, it’s winter. Not so. Any stray hairs catch on my compression tights and pull like mad. Add to that, with the lymphedema, you must moisturise your legs to avoid cracked skin on the swelling – all in all I have the smoothest legs in the county right now.
A friend suggested that I should do one of those boudoir photo shoots for myself, boost up my fading ego. It reminded me of this.
I’m a big believer in the Law of Attraction and positive affirmations. If you know me you have probably had me force you to say you have a new job already before any interview. It works for me. So when I told OH I was going to win the Euro Millions this week, I was only half joking. When you ‘play’ online, if your numbers come up you get an email notification. On Friday night I got that email and then the system wouldn’t refresh for over half an hour! By that time I had paid everyone’s mortgage off, donated millions to animal rescues and bought The Ginger Prince a diamond collar. The email came through eventually – I won €20. But, hey, a win is a win and there’s always next week.